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MeiWindow by furubafan3 MeiWindow :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0
Literature
Tranquil Waters: Reprise
Why hello there love
I see you, strewn across the floor
Why hello there love
I see you staring up at the lights
Why hello there love
I hear your suppressed screams as you drown
Why hello there love
It's time to rise
When you were three, you snuck down those wooden stairs, tiny hands gripping spiral iron bars. You heard thunder and lightning, as the one war that would seal your fate took place.
They laughed at you
The stars
They glinted, mocking you
As they danced away from your grasp
You howled at the sky
Cursed at the moon
And felt the betrayal of your ruined fairy tale
The frosty autumn air burned your salty tears
The thick mud caked your hand me down shoes
And in that moment, you realized
You were alone
You marked yourself as a warrior
When in reality
You were a sacrificial lamb
You accepted your fate
And dove into the murky waters
But now is not the time for tranquil waters
that lull your restless mind to sleep
Now is the time for tranquil waters
that let your thoughts steep
For yo
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Literature
Hope
The cold bitter wind kisses my cheeks as I trudge up the icy road.
My tendons ache under the weight of my heavy clothing, and my breath wafts into thin air.
Hope is a tiny flame I carefully protect. It wavers between my clumsy hands and many mistakes.
One day, I whisper to myself
One day I will find the kindling to spread this flame through out the world.
This is the dream I've had since childhood.
A small tiny seed that flickered faintly by my windowsill in the dead of the night.
I would listen to the Coyotes howl, and the crickets chrip, and the soft breathing of my younger siblings.
Hope is the flame that will change the world.
Hope is a stubborn little thing.
It seeps into your vessels, ebbing and flowing when you least expect it.
It recedes when you believe you need it most, and surges unexpectly
But hope is the flame that will change the world
I huddle beneath the starlit sky and gnaw at the soft threads of my scarf.
Hope is the flame that will change the world.
I clasp my hands
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Cuppa tea by furubafan3 Cuppa tea :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Diversity? by furubafan3 Diversity? :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 1 0 Self portriat in charcoal by furubafan3 Self portriat in charcoal :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Mei's blue dress by furubafan3 Mei's blue dress :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Madeline dress by furubafan3 Madeline dress :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Custom Licca/Azone hybrid with hand sewn dress by furubafan3 Custom Licca/Azone hybrid with hand sewn dress :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Type book cover by furubafan3 Type book cover :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Type book partnership by furubafan3 Type book partnership :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Khmerican Logotype by furubafan3 Khmerican Logotype :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Self portriat in type by furubafan3 Self portriat in type :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0 Wet charcoal by furubafan3 Wet charcoal :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0
Literature
In silence
When I start my work week tomorrow, I'm going to be very small, plain, and try to make no impact on the world. The way I always try to be whenever I feel sad.  I am scared of my own emotions they are strong and visceral, they hurt the ones I love, and I fear letting them out in the open. "Just tell me" he says, "Just tell me what's wrong, and it will okay!" but I can't. How can you when ever bone in your body, every tendon, every fiber, every cell of your being is screaming no, becuase the last time you vulnerable, the last time you tried to explain to someone dear to you who you really were, they denied your very essence.
It doesn't matter that this boy loves you. It doesn't matter that he loves every curve of your body, every sound that comes out of your lips, and every awkward gesture you try to hide from others around you.
You are scared.
You are scared of cold fingers clenching your wrists and violent lies ringing in your ears. You are scared of the humiliation, the guilt, th
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Webcomic Characters by furubafan3 Webcomic Characters :iconfurubafan3:furubafan3 0 0

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So I decided to log back into this old account I have been avoiding for about five years now? And I am cringing at all the horrific "art" that I have posted over the years. I have committed every Graphic Design sin (with angsty eyeliner to boot) and became self indulgent in wallowing in my own self pity, as well as thinking I was an "artist" for listening to Christopher Hart's "How to Draw Anime books".Not to mention all the embarrassing comment history of abusive ex boyfriends, the painfully awkward desire to be something I wasn't, and just the poorly executed work in general I put on here that I thought was actually. 

I have occasionally logged into this account to check up on artists I admire and to clean out my inbox now and again, but I never stayed to long. It hurt to see where I was when I was trying so hard to focus on moving forwards, and I guess this account and all the memories I made on this site were painful. Meaningful but painful. 

I made a new account with a different screen name, and made plans to to move my professional graphic design work and other art there, but I could never fully get invested in it. It was hard to start from scratch after building a strong identity under this account for almost a decade. Even if what I posted was shit, people knew who I was and I made a lot of close friends that changed my life. Not in a good way at times, but I did learn and grow from those experiences. 

But, the communities I interacted with here were toxic, and the environment on here grew more and more triggering for me here so I obviously left and currently just hang around tumblr, and flickr. Great communities but shitty interfaces and poor usability over all. The reason I came back was because I missed the connection I had with my online and real life friends on here. I missed the interface, I missed the customization options and portfolio and print options. I think I finally grew into this site to use it properly. 

I doubt any of you have remembered me. But if so. Hello.


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furubafan3's Profile Picture
furubafan3
Tiffany
Artist | Student | Design & Interfaces
United States
Hello everyone! My name is Tiffany and I'm a College student Studying Communications, with a specialty in Graphic Design and Web Development! I love to draw, write, sew, paint, read tarot cards, and observe the world around me. I am half Chinese, half Cambodian.
Interests

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconcptstarlight:
cptstarlight Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2012  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
Please talk to me.
Reply
:iconpikaole:
pikaole Featured By Owner Jun 30, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
Thank you so much for the watch :)
Reply
:iconlady-liara:
Lady-Liara Featured By Owner Jan 21, 2011
Thanks for the faves ^_~
Reply
:icondelightfulbunny:
DelightfulBunny Featured By Owner Dec 29, 2010
Thanks for the llama! I made super albino llama!
Reply
:iconanotherclichejrocker:
anotherclichejrocker Featured By Owner Dec 2, 2010  Hobbyist General Artist
FRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNDDDDD!! Just stopping by to say. SUP
Reply
:iconhamstar0138:
hamstar0138 Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2010
YAY! Finally we figured out what the account is. LOL I don't go on much so i do forget. XP
Reply
:iconsoimstillunsure:
SoImStillUnsure Featured By Owner Oct 25, 2010  Hobbyist Writer
:icongrin--plz: Thanks for the :+fav: on my piece, "A Promise She Made With Death"
Reply
:iconfurubafan3:
furubafan3 Featured By Owner Oct 26, 2010  Student Interface Designer
Not a problem! :D It's always rare to find good writing on here. Deviantart seems to cater more towards visual art unfortunately.
Reply
:iconnya99:
Nya99 Featured By Owner Oct 13, 2010
Thank you for the fave :)
Reply
:iconun-freak:
Un-Freak Featured By Owner Sep 28, 2010
Sis, it's scissors, not sizzors.
Reply
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